Did I miss something? Did you really just leave me like that? Are you really gone..? October please, you know how much I love you, don't you? Think of how much fun we have had together...and the memories?? Are you really going to be able to walk away from them, get them out of your mind? Please... don't you understand you are my favorite? October.. I feel lost without you. I let you tear down my walls, I let you in. You showed me how much I have to offer this world and that I am unique, loved and purposed. Now... now, I am left with all this destruction. But, it's a good destruction. You changed me. You somehow led me to be more... me. October, I may not understand- but you gave me a plan... and somehow with or without you I am going to do what it is you showed me. So in a way, I am really mad at you. But then again, you saved my life from dishonorable ways and I am grateful for that.