Friday, January 14, 2011

I know better

I believe that sometimes we really can't help where our hearts wander to. I do know for sure though that we can choose not to entertain the thoughts and pursue the situations. I need to not only know but act on the fact that my heart is not a playground. There is a sense of immaturity that arises from bitterness towards those in your past, you can not function well with bitterness. There is a fine line of recreating a future with someone and continually remembering shared past memories.

What if we were held accountable for what we did to our soul like we are for our physical body? What if we were allowed heart break days from work and there were prescriptions to cure soul wounds? Is there anyone who has a degree to tends our hearts like doctors can stitch cuts? And I can attest that scars on the heart need much more attention then a band-aid and occasional ointment. But we don't take the time. We allow our hearts to grow weary, our lives to be in disarray, and our soul is left restless and incapable of trust

I wish there was a heart doctor that held us as accountable as say a Gynecologist does. Warnings of STD's are used to scare woman away from sleeping with too many people. However, no one warns us to stop giving away our hearts and abandoning their worthiness to whoever looks our way. The heart doctor would quote things like, "You knew by sending that text back to him you would be tempted... but you still did it anyway". They would tell us how often we should get checked based on our heart's promiscuity. The doctor would tell us to take "heart rests", similar to bed rests, where we would not be able to even flirt with anyone to make sure we healed up before moving on. 

Almost any girl can relate to the feelings that arise in the Gynecologists office, you are left alone to really stop and mourn over all the "mistakes" you have made in the past. What if had to do the same for all the moments we men consume our thoughts, or desire take over? And the doctors are so blunt with their questions... they uncover the most concealed and private parts of our body and lives, just as the heart doctor would discover the deepest parts of our souls and the longing desires that hide there.

I am one of the few people I know that enjoys having accountability partners and a church that continually reminds me to check my heart first. But still, I give in sometimes. It always feels nice to be complimented and getting coffee with a guy who insists on paying makes me smile. But, I know better than this... having wisdom is knowing what is wrong and actually not doing it. It seems petty to most, but taking care of my heart is something I refuse to take lightly andI know better than this...

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